I apologize that this posting is late, seeing as I have already had my second weekend of training, but I see this as a good thing as it gives me something to discuss.
You see, the reason for my blog tardiness is that my body just finished going through a major transformation. And by transformation I mean sick in bed, going to ER several times, and for almost 3 weeks. This was a true test of my Ahimsa during this time of illness. For those wondering what I am talking about, Ahimsa is non-violence but in this case towards yourself and those around you. In reference to my illness, I had to accept the fact that I was ill, that it was not going away anytime soon, that everything is okay when life falls through, and most importantly that I needed help. For those of you who know me, and for those that don’t yet, I hate asking for help in any form. I am not sure why but I am sure that it makes me feel guilty, weak, and unworthy when asking for assistance in any way. I have always believed that I have the ability to handle everything but I am learning that sometimes people just need help. And with two little ones in the house while being bed ridden, I definitely needed the assist. I am blessed in that I have a great mom who while sick herself will drop everything to come help her SIL, daughter, and granddaughters. Our family is also double blessed in that I have my grandparents and my daughters still have their great-grandparents that would also do anything to help, even come down to watch their great-granddaughters. How does this relate to Ahimsa? Well, I had to silence the violent whispers of being a failure to ask for help in order to receive the help to heal. The true test of acceptance in all its forms is the ability to welcome the situation, either good or bad, and to be at peace with the circumstances and yourself.
Now onto the transformation. Just as a caterpillar cocoons into a butterfly, so must the body, mind, and soul cocoon and transform into something new and brighter. My body shut down and probably for good reasons. For a while I had felt that the world rested on my shoulders alone and now I feel that I am resting on the world for once. It is also a good time to reflect on what landed you into that position in the first place. For this I will refer to Asteya, or non-stealing. However, I am not talking about material theft but the stealing of peace and serenity. For to long I have kept negativity in all its forms bottled up inside or repressed. After inner evaluation, I have learned that negativity, especially drama, is mentally and physically soul sapping. Do I have it all figured out yet? Well, no, but I have started to recognize what true peace, happiness, and love are suppose to look like and how negativity essentially can mask a persons ability to find their true joy of life. So for Asteya, my new outlook is to minimize the forms of negativity in my life and focus more on the everyday blessings. Will I succeed? Sometimes I will and sometimes I won’t. I am human after all.
Now you’re probably thinking to yourself, but how does this all relate to yoga? What does this have to do with yoga? In short, everything requires balance. From physical activity, to mental stability, to nutritional struggles, and just plain life; balance is required in everything. For those of you thinking that yoga is just about stretching or poses, I’m here to tell you it is about so much more. I have never truly found my faith, my soul, until I started yoga. It is the only time I can quiet my mind and the outside world to truly listen to my spirit. I invite you to do the same. To research and inquire how you can find your inner peace. I’m not saying it will be easy or fast, but in the end it will be worth it.
Where do you want to see yourself and how do you want to get there? The journey is up to you!
Until next time!
~Blessings and Namaste~